Protection

There but for the Grace of God go I.

– John Bradford

I was in Chicago recently.

I used to live there when I was in my 20s.

Now, in my 40s,  I see it in a whole new light.

I kept thinking of the quote above. I guess as we get older, we become more intimate with our mortality.  We are not as brave (or clueless) as we used to be. I have no doubt angels were looking out for me throughout my life but I kept them especially busy in my 20’s.

We were at the Vic for a concert.  I’ve been there many times for concerts and movies (Brew and View anyone?).  And now I want to say this: Thank you God for protecting me in the many crowded, dark places I frequented.  Thank you for getting me home safely.  I tested you.  I pushed my luck.  Thank you.

The bike riders were inches away from dying, cutting it close at every turn.  (Is this true or is it just my motherly perception?) Thank you God that I was never hit by a car or hit anyone with my car.

Sitting there at the Vic, an overwhelming feeling of gratitude engulfed me.

I see it as a mother now.  Where I saw opportunity, now I see risk.  Where I saw fun and action, now I see danger and the unknown.  Where I saw freedom and escape, now I see chaos and a lack of boundaries.

So with my gratitude, Lord, today I ask for the ability to see like I’m young again.  To recognize that the need I had to experience the city may one day visit my children.  I may be driving their stuff down in a U-Haul for them to room with 6 girls in a one “bedroom” which looks a lot like a closet.  Give me the courage and the strength to let them go.  Not only to let them go but to encourage them to experience the fun, the action, the freedom and the escape that the city offers.

You and your angels were strong enough to protect me.  I know you are not going anywhere.  I know you’ll be there when my kids are in their 20’s too… Right?