Tag Archives: parenting

Chatting with Tasha Wahl – founder of The Butterfly Effect Be The Change

 

New podcast- I’m so excited to share this conversation with you!  Tasha Wahl is an artist, mother, wife, strong believer and an absolute delight!  She is definitely saying a Great Big YES to living with passion and purpose!

Tasha is the founder of The Butterfly Effect. You can find out all about it at www.butterflyeffectbethechange.com. She created it based on the Gandhi quote about being the change you wish to see in the world. It’s so exciting to see the movement she is creating! 

I love this conversation- we talk about art, family, parenting, faith, tithing, charity, the butterfly effect, Richard Rohr, everything!  I could have talked to her for hours – she is wise and so inspirational!

Now I’m looking for a wall for us to paint in Austin! Stay tuned…

Enjoy the podcast and join the movement by sponsoring a butterfly drop or becoming a butterfly artist! Doesn’t that sound amazing?!?

 

Here is some more information (taken from their website) about Tasha and her husband Erik.  Together they are asking, “Can art change the world?” (I say YES!!) 

As founders of the Wahl Foundation, Erik and Tasha Wahl — artists, entrepreneurs, visionaries, parents and neighbors — are committed to provoke positive change in order to create a better world. Together, they helm The Wahl Group, which challenges corporate America to shift business-as-usual thinking to a more dynamic paradigm, and provides resources to educational organizations so they can tap the innate creativity in their schools’ communities.

Tasha Wahl has served as the foundation’s executive director for more than a decade. In her role, she oversees foundation projects, masterminds events and directs strategies to help the foundation create significant, meaningful results. She was inspired by the generosity of her parents to create The Butterfly Effect Project, which sparks philanthropy movements from small actions.

Erik’s #1 best selling business book, UNTHINK, has been hailed as THE blueprint for leveraging creativity to achieve superior levels of performance. It also won 2013 Business Book of the year from CEO Reads. Erik’s distinct style makes his graffiti artwork a favorite among celebrities, and with it, he has raised millions of dollars for charity. http://www.theartofvision.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

Two years of Sundays

Two years ago when we moved to Austin, we had to find a church.  I don’t mean that in the sense of, “It’s the right thing to do” but rather, we had to find a church.  As in, “our lives depended on it”.  It felt desperate. And guess what, desperate hearts find God.

When you uproot your life, there is this feeling of excitement and opportunity but there is also a very real sense of being untethered. Flailing.

God is my anchor.  And hearing His Word and being around His people is what I needed.  My family needed that too but of course, they sent me out to find the church.  You do the work they were saying in essence, we will show up when you have it all figured out.

I was “alone” when I first heard our pastor speak.  The room was packed but I didn’t know a soul.  This was not a space I’m used to occupying.  I’ve spent years crafting community and placing emphasis on connecting and building relationships.  That is where I thrive.  It’s strange for me to walk into a building filled with hundreds of people and not know a name. Worse yet for me, no one knew mine.

The Pastor spoke and I just knew it.  Sitting with goosebumps and a lump in my throat, I whispered “Thank you”. See, God had led me to this church and this pastor and this moment.  Aloneness and all.  Loss of identity and all.  He wanted to make the Gospel the thing.  He wanted to make JESUS the thing.  Not my outfit or my friends or my kids or my husband or my ministry or my neighbors.  Just me and the Word of God being preached like I’ve never heard.  This guy was wearing jeans and he was my age and he was married and had kids and his Southern accent was both comforting and a reminder of how far away I was from home. But what he was saying reminded me that I am always home in the Lord.  Where I go, He goes.  When I am desperate, He will show up.  When I am lost, He is the way.

I had heard about this pastor and his way of preaching truth that in no way is watered down.  I had heard he “brings it”. And I knew that’s what I wanted.  What I needed.  I was seeking a strong word. A bold declaration.

I believe we are all looking for people to tell us the truth.  I think the truth has been watered down and we are afraid to speak into people’s lives because we don’t want to seem harsh or preachy but we are all secretly hoping for someone to have the courage to speak the truth with confidence and courage and conviction. Speaking truth is real love.

The next week I took my family and again, was blown away.  He was preaching from the Old Testament and he had maps up on the screen and was diving into geography and history and I actually had to laugh.  He was speaking directly to my husband and son who want facts and love to know the history of things.  The second week we went as a family, he preached the Gospel, straight up. He didn’t mince words, he didn’t flinch or apologize.  I cried like a baby.  Right there, I thought, THANK YOU GOD for this man who is PREACHING THE GOSPEL TO MY FAMILY.  I went up to him afterwards and thanked him profusely, blubbering and carrying on.  He smiled and warmly shook my hand and welcomed me and my family.  I’m so grateful he said YES! to the call on his life.

We’ve been there two years and I can’t help but think those two years were exactly placed on purpose as the two years before my daughter leaves for college.  The Lord’s timing is always perfect. As we sat in church this morning, I realized it was our last Sunday before she goes to college.  We were all there together.  We would be again on  holidays and vacations but not every Sunday anymore.  I was grateful for the rhythm of Sundays, the predictability, all of us together, lunch afterwards.   I will miss this, I thought. I will miss her.

There are so many things we do as parents to prepare children for college.  Many have to do with academics and manners and common sense stuff and personal hygiene issues. Honestly, I’m still telling my teenagers to brush their teeth.  We try to teach kindness and respect and decency and compassion and empathy and independence.  We tell them we love them and we tell them all the things our parents told us.  I spent some time yesterday explaining how to do laundry and how important it is to separate darks from lights.  (I still mess this up sometimes!)

I’ve always known that my most important role is to teach them about God and how much He loves them.  To teach them about Jesus and His sacrifice and His gift of grace.  Sure, I told them about God and I took them to church all their lives, but these last two years…we have lived like we believe it.  The church is a big part and the pastor is instrumental in teaching us the Word of God and how to apply it.

However, I would have to say, it has been in the undoing that we have most profoundly met the Lord.  It has been in the flailing.  It has been in the many, many times over the last two years when we had to each individually walk into a room knowing not a soul and know we would be okay.  It is in the times we did it afraid, whatever it was.  It has been in the practice of trusting…the practice of believing…the practice of leaning into God…that we can now truly understand.

Faith doesn’t grow in comfort zones.

I heard Christine Caine talk about how in today’s world everyone wants everything to happen quickly, like selfies on Snapchat or Instagram.  But God moves at His own pace, His process is more like old school photography.  He takes time to develop us and a lot of our developing happens in the dark.

Two years ago we were invited into the darkroom.  We were invited out of our comfort zone.  We were invited into a new thing.  We said yes and it changed everything.

Now my daughter is invited into a new thing.  A new dark room.  A new stage of development.

And I’m invited into one as well but for the first time, we will not be in the same dark room.  We go into our development alone and when we see each other again, we will be changed.  A little more of us will be revealed.

I am not afraid to let her go.  She has heard the Gospel and she has spent two years of Sundays sitting near her mother who sings off key with hands raised in praise for the way the Lord will always, always lead us Home.  No matter where we are.

 

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©2016 Sue Bidstrup, Great Big Yes™ All Rights Reserved

To My Daughter with Learning Differences

Update!!! So excited this  was also shared on Huffington Post! Click link to check it out!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/to-my-daughter-with-learning-differences-whom-i-once_us_573a3382e4b06dede18b9937?hd45lep4nfyctyb9

This letter was written and submitted to The Mighty before I posted it here.  It is also posted on www.themighty.com with a few minor edits. I’m so grateful to my daughter for letting me share her story.  I pray it encourages others.  

Dear Daughter,

Thank you for being my child. I need you. Thank you for being you.

Although I never thought I’d say this, I’m grateful for the struggles we have had surrounding your ADHD and dyslexia and sensory issues. While I know for you, this has made school difficult, and it has made life challenging, I want to go on record and say that you have made me a better person.

I spent years wishing you were different. I didn’t want you to have to suffer. I have to admit it and we’ve talked about it before…it’s not easy to parent a child who is struggling. You become a mom who is struggling. You look at all the kids who are “thriving” and you wish they were your children. You start to resent the other moms. You close down and protect and build walls. I did all of that.

But you know what else I did? I fought for you. I fought with you. We stood together and reckoned with the future. Sometimes our fists were up and sometimes our hearts were open but we were in it. We were strong and courageous. Together.

I told you that you could do anything and you listened. You did it. High school graduation is upon us and you are headed to college.

 

natalie book

I think back to kindergarten and the teacher telling me that you didn’t quite understand the letters. In second grade when you were formally diagnosed with a learning disability, they kept saying, “She understands, she’s so smart, she just can’t decode the letters”. Or “She knows the material, she just can’t get it on paper”.

While often we were focusing on the decoding and the “treatment”, we tucked away the truth, “She’s so smart, she understands” in our hearts and we believed. I hope and pray that’s what you heard.

We had years of doctor appointments and therapy and meetings at school and tutoring and scary trips to the neurologist and so many questions. We fought for extra time on tests and notes written out. The paperwork alone takes up a whole room.

We were blessed with a school district that had resources and teachers who understood. Except for a few losers. Remember the one time we were so happy you got a D- we jumped up and down and cheered? Remember how I called your one teacher an “Asshole who doesn’t understand”? Well, I stand by that. Some people don’t get it. But because of you, I do get it. I am so grateful to be firmly planted on the side of understanding and compassion.

You can always be assured we’ve got your back.

Oh how I worried about you. I sought to understand you. I didn’t understand you. I cried and felt sorry for myself. My sense of entitlement was called into question. That one time when I was complaining to Dad and he said, “It’s not about you” was a moment of truth that changed the way I parent and live.

In an effort to get you what you needed, I called in the experts and I read the books and I prayed in a way that required surrender and trust. You gave me courage and you taught me to ask for help and you brought me closer to God.

You are heading off to college next fall and while I know I am not always a perfect mother, I can honestly say you are the perfect child for me.

I read a quote the other day that said, “Why do you keep trying to change the people God sent to change you?” This hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m sorry for trying to change you.

I think at times I might have justified my desire for you to change by explaining that it would just be easier for you if you were “like everybody else”.

I take it back.

Can I take it back?

You are a gift. You have changed me for good.

This is only the beginning. Now you get to go out and bless the world. I will be cheering you on forever. I’m thankful that I have been close enough to see you…God’s unique, beautiful creation…becoming.

So thank you daughter, for helping me become a better me.

And thank you God.

For knowing what I need and giving her to me.

I’m forever grateful.
©2016 Sue Bidstrup, Great Big Yes™ All Rights Reserved