Breaking Bread Together

Do you have friends that think differently than you do about politics?

Unfortunately, a lot of us would say “no” to that question. I think we seek people out that agree with us so we feel good about what we think. We look for friends that agree with us on major topics such as politics and religion.

This is why there is such a massive divide in our country on these topics. We don’t know anyone who has a different point of view so we can make the other side “evil” – we take the humanity out of our opponents so we can hate them.

I used to have a boss that made us eat together as a team because she said it’s important to “break bread” together. This is really wise.

When you eat together and share your stories, you become friends. You could spend years breaking bread together and laughing and talking and listening without ever bringing up the topics of religion or politics. I love this because over the eating and sharing, a trust is developed. There is a give and take in the relationship. You become comfortable with one another.

When you have a relationship that is built on time spent together talking about everything else – the weather, sports, shopping, cooking, TV, movies, music, kids, jobs, jokes, restaurants, books – you are solid enough to bring up the tough stuff.

We are not only our political beliefs or only our religious affiliations. We are so much more than that!

We all have SO MUCH in common. We all want to be loved and understood. We want to have a voice and we want to have power in our personal lives. We all want to be healthy and whole. We want to be validated as worthy and important. We look for pleasure and laughter and joy. We want to share hope and healing. We love our country and we love our families. We struggle in relationships. We worry about our kids and our parents and our homes and our marriages. We are grateful and funny sometimes and conflicted and anxious at other times. We all laugh and we all cry. At our core we are all good people.

When we talk to each other and just hang out together, we see all the things we have in common. We bond. We realize everyone is doing the best they can with what they have. We wish each other well.

If we have this kind of a start as friends and we find out we think differently on a topic like religion or politics, we will be able to give each other the benefit of the doubt. We will not be filled with anger and hatred toward the other person because we have a history of common interests and shared stories.

In fact, I think we will finally have a chance to really hear the other side if this happens because we will let the other person talk. We may say to ourselves, “I don’t agree but I like this person and I respect what they have to say”, instead of what’s so common today which is total anger and hatred toward anyone who thinks differently than you.

We have demonized the other side. This is especially true when discussing politics in this country. We are in gridlock. We are making ourselves sick with hatred.

We can blame the media and the pundits and the venom that is spewed daily in Washington and around the country. We can get really mad and retreat from society. We can attack people and demand they tell us which side they are on so we can label them and turn them into the bad guy. We can isolate ourselves in a self-righteous haze of judgment and condemnation.

Or, I have a better idea…we can encourage people of all beliefs to “break bread” together.  I think it’s the only way we will stop spewing and start sharing…our lives, our dreams, our struggles, and eventually, when the time is right, we can share our political and religious beliefs. By then it will be okay. We will be friends.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
— Martin Luther King Jr.