I’m thinking about camp. I just picked my daughter up and it was our first time. The first time for all of us…me, my husband, and our daughter. We were all tentative and excited and scared and hopeful. I have realized that one of the best things you can do to feel alive is to try something new. After camp, I think my daughter would agree with me.
I read a great column in the Tribune about camp. It is written by Garrison Keillor and you can find it at http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/columnists/ct-oped-0630-keillor-20100630,0,4665639.column.
He has a great line in there about watching parents drop off their kids on the bus to camp and that scene having more drama than a movie on the silver screen. But my favorite observation of his is this…he talks about the three different groups of people on the bus. The Defenseless (the children), the Clueless (the teenage camp counselors) and the Helpless (the parents). I love this. It’s so true. He points out that he has been all of these characters at one time in his life. Haven’t we all?
Even if we never went to camp, we can relate to the feeling of being the defenseless child. If we’ve never been a camp counselor, I don’t doubt that we have been the clueless teenager. And now, I find myself in the role of the helpless parent. No matter what I want, what I plan, what I hope for my child, I cannot make that happen for her. I cannot orchestrate friendship, laughter, lightness, faith and gratitude in her life. I cannot make her comfortable in her skin. I cannot save her.
Keillor ends his article asking God for mercy. I guess that’s what we all have to do. Because when we do that, we are not helpless, clueless or defenseless. We are wise. No, we cannot save our children…but we know who can.
I love what you wrote about camp. I journal a lot and upon returning from taking my oldest to camp for the first time this summer I put these thoughts down; thanks for letting me share them with you:
There is an odd sort of quiet in my home tonight. My oldest child is away at camp for five days. We dropped her off this afternoon, got her settled and went on our way. And now we are home, and all is well, but as I said, there is an odd sort of quiet in the house.
It’s our first experience with the camp thing for our child. She was thrilled! She was excited and eager to get there! I think she has been organizing all summer (a shame it’s only five days). It’s a fine arts camp so she loaded the car with sketch book, pencils, clarinet, sheet music and then the items that are so very necessary to make it through dorm living in mid July without air conditioning.
When she got to her room assignment, she loved it! This child of mine who likes the best of things was thrilled with the dorm room! She and her friend immediately began unpacking and organizing and setting their beds…my daughter was so independent! She was so comfortable getting settled that I joked with my husband that perhaps she would like to find a high school next year that had a dorm (but I immediately dismissed that idea…truly I am not ready for her to live a way from home). She loved the bathroom sink that came with this room. She did not complain about the beds or the dressers; she truly was in heaven at her summer camp set up. Keeping my fingers crossed that the class and learning part is as exciting and fun!
My youngest was with us today and she boasted that she could not wait for the two years until it would be her turn to come to camp! Really? I could! It’s only camp, I know, but it’s the maturity that I saw in my oldest daughter that perhaps I never give her credit for having that somewhat left me longing for the little girl I once cuddled through the nite. It was her ability to walk into the situation, get organized and move forward. I suppose it’s what parents want and hope that their children are able to do. Still, in the situation, it felt someone odd, but I was so proud!
Then it came time for our good byes. She looked at me and asked, “Mom are you crying?” Truly I was not; it was at least 85 degrees in the room and my face was dripping with sweat (I sweat constantly at 46 which can be the subject of another story), anyway, she gave me this HUGE hug. I can’t remember the last time my daughter hugged me so tight and so long. It was a hug that told me she was excited, appreciative, thankful, and eager to get the experience rolling! Somehow I knew she needed to get her week at camp started, and I was ready. I hugged her back and told her I loved her and to be good and to be happy!
Now I am back at home with my husband and our other two children and their summer routines. We are settled in the family room finishing up the weekend together, and there is an odd sort of quiet in the house.
Thanks Sue, I needed that. It reminded me that I can’t CONTROL the outcome of my children only guide them. WE are going to camp in two weeks, so I will try to be wise and let God remind her to wear her sunscreen and put on her bug spray 🙂
Thank you Sue- I love this! Great reminder that we can’t save our kids from many of life’s bumps(big and little) in the road. This can be really hard but I will try hard next time(probably today!) to leave it in the hands of the big guy…
xo