Can you handle the truth?

Who do you go to when you need advice?

This morning I was stopped by a police officer.  He said he clocked me doing 60 mph in a 40 mph zone.  He asked for my license and proof of insurance.  I had a huge pile of “what not” in my glove compartment.  As I hurriedly tried to rummage through the mess to find the insurance card, he seemed exasperated.  I finally found an insurance card but it was expired.  He gave me a ticket. 

This was not the way I wanted to start my day.  I was embarrassed and disappointed in myself. 

It would be easy to be mad at the police officer but he was just doing his job.  When I told other people the story, they said things like, “he didn’t have to be such a jerk” or “that’s ridiculous, you should fight it” or “there’s no way you were going that fast, that’s unfair”, etc.

It’s interesting, although I was embarrassed and disappointed, I didn’t blame him at all.  He wasn’t a jerk, I was going too fast and it was fair.  I deserved a ticket. 

I was completely unaware of my speed.  I was unconsciously driving the car and someone had to wake me up!

In fact, I’m thinking maybe he saved me from a future accident that might have happened if I wasn’t reminded to slow down.  Maybe he did me a favor.

We need more honesty in all areas of our lives.  Maybe someone telling us the truth about what we are doing (with our relationships, our choices, our behaviors) will help us.  Maybe we need our friends and relatives to stop us and wake us up! 

Have you ever had someone tell you something you didn’t want to hear?  Did you get mad at them?

Isn’t it interesting?  We can always find someone to back us up and agree with us.  We can always find someone who will listen to us complain or justify our anger.  We may even have friends we can go to that will join us in our bad behavior.  Some “friends” encourage us to make poor choices.

I think it’s more difficult to find someone who will speak the truth to us, someone who will do us the favor of being honest with us especially when what we are doing is “not all that great”.

I think this is why we often seek advice of professionals.  When we are really in need of some guidance, we go to a doctor or a therapist or a Pastor.   We rely on them to tell us the truth. 

Recently I heard a speaker tell preteen girls about the internet.  She said to always think of the 4 P’s.  She advised them to not post anything on the internet that you would not want the 4 P’s to see.  The 4 P’s are your parents, the police, the principal and your pastor. 

I think this is good advice for all of us for the internet and for life.  Don’t do anything that would not be approved by the 4 P’s.  The 4 P’s will tell us the truth. 

We know this.  This is why we don’t always go to the 4 P’s but go to our friends instead.  Sometimes it’s like  A Few Good Men…we “can’t handle the truth”. 

I feel good about how I handled the ticket and the police officer today.  I’m not always so accepting but today, I was able to “handle the truth”.  I need to slow down and pay attention.  I’m the only one who is to blame for the ticket.  I paid the fine and I’ll attend traffic school.  I’m not happy about it but I’ve accepted it.  Without the ticket, I would have still been driving unconsciously and who knows what would have happened.

Many of us are going through life in an unconscious haze.  Do we have people in our lives that are willing to speak the truth?  Do we need to wake up? 

Here’s a challenge:  Next time someone speaks the truth to you, notice how you feel.  Do you feel like complaining and blaming? Try to stop and think.  What behavior got you into this?  What behavior do you need to change?   

Instead of being mad at the truth teller, maybe you should thank them.  Really, they are just doing you a favor.

©2011 Sue Bidstrup, Great Big Yes™ All Rights Reserved