It’s my anniversary.  19 years.

Here we are on the Ferris Wheel at Navy Pier.

I thought it was appropriate because marriage is like a ride. Scary. Unpredictable. Exhilarating. There are ups and downs. It’s fun. Often exhausting. Sometimes leaving us with messy hair and feeling like we are going to puke.

After 19 years, I can say my favorite part of marriage is the stuff no one sees.  The early mornings with our coffee and our dreams.  The talking (mostly me) and the listening (mostly him) and the knowing that he gets me.  The friendship and the coziness of it.  The laughing at things no one else would understand.  Talking about our kids and reassuring each other that it’s going to be okay. The building something together that is messy and complicated and perfectly imperfect.  Something that is ours.  Something sacred.

I heard a woman on the radio say that marriage is one of the tools God uses to make us more Holy.

I decided I agree.

Not Holy like perfect.  Because that’s not possible.  But Holy as in able to offer grace and love unconditionally.  Marriage makes us more holy because it takes prayer and commitment and truth and forgiveness to make it work.  And all that stuff is so holy.

Think about what we need to make a marriage work!

Love. Faith. Trust. Commitment. Hope. Truth. Forgiveness. Humility. Grace. Patience. Wisdom. Compromise. Sacrifice. Acceptance.

That’s a tall order.  So we pray for those things and we board the ride.  Sometimes closing our eyes feeling anxiety and other times laughing with our arms in the air.  The ride demands things of us and we change and we learn and we grow. And then when we have a moment to catch our breath, we look back with wonder and awe and gratitude.

As far as the “great big yes” moments of life, getting married is one of the biggest.  I’m not sure I knew what I was doing at 25 when he asked me to spend the rest of my life with him.  Actually, I’m pretty sure that I was clueless…but I said “yes” and that has made all the difference.

©Sue Bidstrup 2013 Great Big Yes ™ All Rights Reserved

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