Letter to My Daughter at College Drop Off

Well, it’s here. It’s time. You are ready.

But am I?

From day one, you have been my sidekick. My laughing buddy. My dreamer, talker, sharer. You have let me walk with you. You have held my hand and let me hold yours. You have listened to my heart. Heck, you are my heart. Walking around outside of me.

Your beauty goes deep. Inside of you there is a light that shines with hope and promise and infinite joy. You are destined for more. Explore, seek, find, enjoy. Don’t be afraid. And if you are, that’s okay, do it afraid, step out in faith. Fear is not your destiny. Don’t limit yourself. Be open and stay open. Do what brings you joy.  Laugh a lot.

Listen to your gut. When something feels weird or off or gross, trust that feeling and leave. Your intuition won’t lie. Trust yourself. You know.

Don’t walk around with preconceived notions and judgments, just be in the moment. Listen. Open your heart to new people and things. Keep learning. Stay teachable. There is a path before you and it is filled with opportunity and excitement and possibility. Nothing is too good to be true. Dream big.

Some days might hurt. Some days you will want to crawl under the covers and disappear. It’s okay. That’s normal. Log off your phone and listen to music, or take a walk or read a book. Enter back into yourself. The place of knowing inside of you that will nourish you. Look in the mirror and remember who you are and whose you are. It’s okay to nap and disengage and even to cry. Call me. I understand. It’s necessary. Don’t expect every day to be happy, that’s not realistic. But remember if you are having a bad day, it’s just a bad day, not a bad life. Feel it but do not get stuck there. Everything will be new in the morning.

You will miss us. And we will be longing for your voice and your spirit. You will leave a hole here that will be glaring at us every time we sit down to dinner. You matter in our home, in our family. We will feel incomplete without you. And yet, it’s time.

For 18 years, your tears have been my tears, your joys mine too. You have grown and learned and in walking through the pain and joy with you, I have learned too. I have had to grow up and say goodbye to patterns of my own and wounds left over from long ago. There’s nothing like looking into your daughter’s eyes and seeing your own self, your own journey. When I guided you or prayed with you or gave you advice, I was preaching to the young version of myself. All the things I still need to remember. We have healed each other.

Don’t get too caught up in the image you portray. Concentrate on the real you. The inner you, your mind and soul and thought life. Fill your mind with all that is true and good. Nourish your body, take care of yourself. You don’t need drugs or alcohol. You don’t want to be numb. You want to be awake for every single minute of it. You have one wild and beautiful life, don’t miss it. Fill your soul with the Truth. Capital T, the one that supersedes all circumstances and stories we tell ourselves. The Truth is  You are loved, you are seen, you are known, you are worthy and God has great plans for you.

We are watching and cheering and filled with overwhelming joy for you. Be a cheerleader for others, be a light, share hope, believe in yourself and in the world. We have no doubt you might rile things up a bit and that’s good. Be you. Create a life you love and live it, deeply, passionately – filled with joy and gratitude. You’ve got this!

Also, call your mom.

©2018, Sue Bidstrup, Great Big Yes™, All Rights Reserved

Author: Sue

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