Oh friends. I come before you repentant. I have gone under the needle and now I have a black eye. Before I went in to ask my dermatologist to turn back the clock, I had this feeling. Hmmm I thought, maybe I shouldn’t do this. I joked with him, “I feel like I may end up with a horn growing out of my head just to show me where vanity gets me.” He laughed.
But I kid you not. I have a black eye.
Friends say it will heal. I know it will but I felt compelled to write about this. It’s real life and it feels oh so relevant as many women (and men) my age get botox or some other form of cosmetic upkeep. Some compare it to highlights, or make up, or working out, or using wrinkle cream. Others, like my mom, say, “What is it? Why would you do that?” I have several friends who brush it off, “Of course I get it, started years ago, love it!”
I have taken to staring at everyone’s forehead on TV and watching intently, “Does it move?” “How old is she?”
I am a child of the world. I also love Jesus. Which makes me think and pause and pray. He has taught me that it’s not about me and the first will be last and vanity is bad, bad, bad (Wait, did Jesus teach that? Is that from church? Where did I get that?). I’ll note here I grew up Catholic so I speak guilt and penance. Maybe you can sense it?
I have one foot in and one foot out of the world. I’ve always been like this. I’ve always sensed this was an issue. Like, maybe I need to get it together. I feared I couldn’t be both. I couldn’t care about beauty or fitness and also love Jesus. I was told Christians don’t care about that surface stuff. “In the world but not of it”, and all that. However, I’m starting to see it as my unique way of relating. Nothing is wasted in God’s economy so I don’t want to waste this. Maybe you have been conflicted too?
Maybe you want to say, “Sue, it’s okay, I had that and it went away in a week”. (I’ll take those comments :)) Maybe you are judging me. Maybe you are waiting to see me speak live and move my forehead to see if it “worked” or was “worth it”. Maybe you are considering botox and now you are scared. Maybe you are a Dr, ready to call me and tell me you can do it better. Maybe you are a beauty consultant ready to pounce because you can help me “grow old gracefully”. Maybe you are an older woman, wishing I didn’t worry about wrinkles. Maybe you are younger, rolling your eyes saying, “Who cares about wrinkles?” Maybe you are someone who gets botox and loves it and owns it and looks amazing. It’s all good. We are who we are. I’m not hear to judge. Clearly.
So, I’ll just be over here wearing a long bang and big earrings hoping you don’t notice my black eye.
Oh, and on the way out the door my dermatologist recommended a chemical peel.
I think I’ll wait on that.
Oh my gosh this is exactly what I needed. As my 40th birthday approaches in a few weeks I’ve dabbled with Botox a few times and everytime I want it, I go through this same thing. Is it against Christ- am I behind vain, am I a bad Christian. When you said you find yourself staring at peoples foreheads I laughed out loud because I do the same. Thinking if I can find enough people that have Botox then I can let go of any guilt I feel about it. Thank you for your honesty ❤️
Can I also say that when god asks us not to do something he wont leave us feeling empty and unfilled. He promises that when we drink from his cup our cup will overflow like the woman at the well she obviously had a need to feel beautiful and desired but it never worked it left her feeling empty and she needed it again and just like Botox for many women they are drinking from an empty cup but when we get real with the lord and get on our knees and say ‘Lord forgive me for not believing your love is enough and can you please fill me till my cup overflows ” and believe me do you not think that Jesus will honor that prayer ? and fill us up with his sweet amazing unconditional love that truly lasts and truly satisfies.
The bible says do not be conformed to the ways of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. The ways of this world tell us to think about ourselves and how others perceive us and to get our worth and validation from the world this is called sin and it’s a false god no matter what way you dress it up. Many christians come back with the argument that you could say the same about fashion and make up but fashion and make up are creative gifts that i believe god gave women to express their feminine beauty they don’t get in the way of the aging process but Botox is against something that is a natural process of life. I believe when we get older god uses it to help us realise that the beauty we experienced in our youth is not what we should be holding on to to define us but true beauty as the bible says is within and if we try go against the aging process it makes us vain and self centered and it gets in the way of god using the aging process for us to start to look within and to develop the true beauty of what it is to be a woman. I believe there is a wonderful unique beauty a woman can have when she knows that she knows that she is desired by Jesus not matter what she looks like and nothing in all this world can take that away from her because it’s a deep work that only the holy spirit can do but only if we allow him.
Hi all, I’m a 25 year old Christian, raised in faith. Recently I’ve decided to do Botox for issues with one side of my face lacking muscular structure to perform as efficiently as it’s opposite. It’s been a big insecurity of mine for a while. I struggle between the thought of “God loves me the way I am” and knowing how much the asymmetry in my face makes me feel so self conscious of being around others sometimes. In my heart, I love God, truly. In my heart, I am not deciding to get the treatment to be “vain”. I think that is what matters, God looks at your heart and your motives.
I know a lot of people mention that we are transforming a creation that God has already made. However, I do think of makeup, hairstyling, etc. Botox and filler are not permanent, it goes away, just like most of these other things. If you don’t like it, you can stop or get rid of it. In counter to that, I think of people who have cancer, or children born with cancer. Didn’t God make that? But we go through treatments and therapy to get rid of it. Are we not too eliminating or correcting God’s creation? Of course, this is for good, to save a life. However, the action is still the same, correcting something that came naturally. Just something that came to my head, food for thought.
Thank you for this. No condemnation for those is Christ 💗 Also : All things work together for good to them who love the Lord according to His purpose Romans 8:28
I feel Botox isn’t right. And north is plastic surgery. Unless there are deformaties etc. We can try use the word of God I. All areas of our lives to try satisfy our decision making for circumstance like bots and plastic surgery. I feel fashion and makeup and hair etc are still something that glorify God. The most concerning thing is women and men trying to portray themselves as naturally perfect skin or lips or eyebrows. Makng others especially the younger generation feel very inadequate from A looks perspective and not to mention adults feeling the pressure as well to may just try some Botox or fillers. The pressure is there and it’s a programmed pressure. The manipulation to normalise this is just the same as many other issues relating to. Or being satisfied with gender types etc. . Everyone wants to look handsome and beautiful. But to not be satisfied with the tools and resources we have such as fashion and makeup .. and resort to body altering and infecting chemicals into your body as well.. It just doesn’t see right. Even I may one day soon. Have eyebrows tattooed on…. Because as an aging women it’s not longer acceptable to have sparse or no brows die to aging. It’s sad. We should be promoting the gift and the blessing of the ever changing body as we age. That we are alive and life is beauty. And each aging person is beautiful as they age.
Thank you for your help. I have been feeling guilty getting botox but , reading, your blog I feel so much better. No condemnation for those who believe in Jesus Christ!
I have had botox but I don’t profess to be aligned to any specific faith, I just help vulnerable and disadvantaged children and people in my 30 year long career as a teacher and carer.. I suppose if I were confessed and committed to any religion, I would ask myself, is my own striving for physical perfection justified. I suspect that if it means that much to you, somewhere in your soul, you will justify it. The issue is, if you didn’t have it and put the money towards a deprived, child’s education, would that be a better use of your finances? Only you can answer that.
From the words of the prophet Samuel, “People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” God knows the true motive in your heart as to why you want plastic surgery. He can see your true desires, and knows when the desire to get cosmetic surgery is for attention, pride or jealousy. When vanity motivates a person to undergo surgery, they have become their own idol. The Bible warns us not to be vain or conceited (Philippians 2:3-4) and not to draw attention to ourselves by the way we look (1 Timothy 2:9).
Then I read this 🙁
Also states our bodies are not our own and brought at a price.
Fact I feel convicted I already know the answer I’m just so scared for it too all wear off I hear wrinkles worse after using such , I’m scared I’m insecure if I am honest I’ve been getting it 6 years in forehead between brows and eye sides
I actually came across this post because I get Botox . However I came to Jesus a couple of weeks ago, I couldn’t help my heart feel convicted yet in due to get some in two week, am I scared for it too wear off yes !!
Can I be a follower of Jesus and still get Botox ?
This is how I found your blog right now
Dear Sue,
Loved reading your post. Thank you for sharing. I have been getting Dysport on my forehead for years, now. I am 58 and always in the mindset of being healthy, looking youthful and staying in shape. Not to obsession, but it is a priority. Lately I’m feeling convicted about the treatments and praying that I not spiritually poisoning my temple. I am a lover of Jesus and have surrendered my life to Him. Now I wonder if not fully. I ask Him to guide me on this issue.
Any thoughts to share?
Blessings to you,
Carolyn
Hi Carolyn! Thanks for your comment! I totally understand all you are saying. I love that you are asking the questions and seeking the Lord’s guidance. No one can tell us the “right” way to do things but when we feel convicted, we have to explore that with the Lord. I think it’s an ongoing conversation, not something we decide once but something that will change over time and with Seasons of life. We know our worthiness is not found in our appearance so when I start to put too much emphasis on it, whether it’s exercise or weight loss or Botox or clothes or hair, (nothing is wrong with any of these things Unless they become the main thing!)I realize maybe I need to connect with Jesus! 😊 so I can remember who I am and whose I am. Thanks for being willing to talk about this! It’s good to examine!! Blessings to you!!
Sue
Friend, if you are feeling convicted, that is the Holy Spirit. Humble yourself to the Lord and choose to over Him rather than rationalize. He has greater things for you that are past our vessel. We are to understand the outer is wearing away but the inward is being renewed. It is not an easy decision to say no to the world- to ourselves. But we choose to obey our Master not our flesh. If we follow Christ, He will take us places that reveal our true motives and ask us if they truly honor Him. You are loved.
Dear Sue,
I am almost 54 and am now in a public speaking position which is making me VERY aware of the vast amount of wrinkles on my forehead and the two demonic lines between my eyes. Can I just say I have been SUFFERING with the thought of how wrong it would be for me to get botox. I keep feeling God is telling me He created me to look like this for a reason and he wants me to embrace every season – wrinkly ones included! But I would be lying if I said I’m not confused. I AM SO CONFUSED! I also keep telling myself “get over it and just grow old gracefully.” Heck I’ve even thought “maybe one day I will speak about this” but still… I have to look in the mirror every day knowing with just one little shot I might look a lot better. Anyway, by this age you’d think I’d stop comparing myself and just accept who I am and I secretly (God knows ) wish I could be like the carefree women who just go for it and don’t overthink things to the point they’re a guilty miserable mess. Yep that would be me and I was raised Catholic too haha. So for what it’s worth I totally resonate with your post and would love to hear your thoughts. Thanks!
Hi Lori! Oh I can relate!!! 🙂 Thank you for sharing. I struggled for awhile and had some of those same thoughts and then I went ahead and got botox! I kept saying, “I want to look normal. I want to look my age.” I’m sure they are like, “Then why are you here???” 🙂 I think it’s an individual decision but I don’t think it’s a bad thing or a sinful thing. You touched on some of the ways we compare and have guilt and are confused. That’s the stuff I pray about. Lord, lead me and remind me that I am worthy in your eyes. Even if I have some wrinkles around mine! 🙂
Thank you so much for writing this. I am a 58 year old Christian women. Today I talked to my dermatologist about Botox. I haven’t done it yet but really struggle with this lately. I wonder if I’m becoming too vain and should just age gracefully. At 58 these I’m having these thoughts more and more. Your blog was literally exactly what I have been battling with. It’s such a relief to read it. Thanks again so much for your honesty and courage to broach this topic.
Oh Carol, I’m just seeing this now. Thank you for reading and for your comment. It’s a tough topic right? I’m glad this resonated with you! Blessings! Sue
Ditto, same, 100%! My sweet hubby says I’m beautiful but I keep comparing where I am wrinkle-wise to others I THINK are my age and I’m doing worse! I know I have face-scrunching habits that are taking their toll and am really considering a little interventions around the lips and chin. What I want is permission! 😀
Hi Linda! I get it!!! 🙂 I think it’s hard not to compare ourselves but we never know how old others are or if they’ve had botox. We assume a lot when we look at others and compare ourselves. I wish I wouldn’t have used a straw so much because I’m seeing it around my lips! I brought this up to my husband and he’s like, “NO don’t do anything to your lips! I don’t want you looking like you have big duck lips!” 🙂 I think we just need to decide what’s right for us individually and if we decide to do a little “maintenance”, we can give ourselves permission. Thanks for your comment!
😂😂😂😂😂 lol ! Ok first I’m not going to do a comment on every blog. but I had too on this one. I so relate, Yes.. “me too”. and I think Christians can get Botox, or that is what I tell myself🙄 seriously, probably makes him Laugh & shake his head in the we see our age,
I feel it’s a personal decision so it’s about the “sister” & her heart. On a side note,I never have had black eyes… I go to a plastic surgeon, I know derms do this all the time but I feel pc have the touch and do it more. Also fish oil and ibuprofen can make one more sensitive. If u go to that derm again I would take anirica a few days before thru the day, just in case🤭. Love your authenticity 🙂
oh my gosh I love this. Thanks for commenting – and it’s perfectly fine if you want to comment on all the posts! 🙂 Thanks for the tips!